Life in the Middle Lane

I went to college without really knowing what I want to do. Over the four years I changed my major four times. I started as a Political Science major, then I was a International Business/French major, then I switched to a plain Business major, finally I found my home in a very unlikely place—The Philosophy and Religion department.

I started college without really knowing what I wanted out of a four year degree, other than to be rich and famous. I loved the being a Philosophy major because I got to do my favorite things; read, think, talk and write. When folks asked me what I expected to do with a degree in a Philosophy, at first I shrugged. At one point, I assumed that I would go to Law School but in my heart I knew that was a cop-out. By the time I graduated, I wasn’t worried about the naysayers because I knew that I can do ANYTHING with my degree because I’ve learned how to THINK.

Tell that to the employees who wanted to see me with a Business or Journalism degree.

It took me a little while to get my act together, but I soon I found a field (Government) where I fit, and I knew that making a career in the public sector was right for me.

It took a few more years, and a graduate degree, interviewing my mentors, therapy and a life coach for me to identify what is most important to me, the thing that I would do for free.

What’s important to me?

I write about it, here and on Cosmopolitan Urbanist.

-Being the Best Monica Ever and hopefully inspiring someone else to be the best them ever

-Making public organizations better through technology

-Making neighborhoods stronger through urban design and community development

None of which I get to do in my current job. My job pays the bills, but it doesn’t turn me on.  Every once in a while, I get excited about the opportunity to learn a new skill set at work. Some days, I’m just happy just to have a paycheck at the end of the month and I don’t care that I’m not content in my work. Most days, though, I am so bored and frustrated and anxious that I sit in my cube wondering how I got to this place and what the hell do I have to do to get out of here.

I read Naomi at Ittybiz and Chris Guillebeau at The Art of Non-Conformity and now I’m completely jealous of Jamie at A Life in Transition. I read their stuff and I get emotionally confused. I’m so excited for them and inspired by them, but I also get sad because I feel so ordinary. I feel so unaligned with my values. I feel that I’m just getting by and not living my best life.

I’m the most goal oriented person I know, but I’m feeling a little stuck about taking the small steps that I need to, to move towards my best life. When I think about my stuckness, I want to throw my head back and have a Charlie Brown moment. WAAAHHHH!  This is not my life!!

During a recent conversation, my mom asked me if I was happy. I decided to forego the “I’m fine” answer, and answer honestly. I had to tell her that no, I’m not happy. I’m absolutely not happy. I’m not supposed to be a fricking management analyst. I ranted about how this recession has put a cramp in all my plans, and how I don’t feel like I’m doing what I’m supposed to do. After a moment of silence, she agreed with me.

She said, “You have a ministry- not necessarily religiously- but you are supposed to be helping people to do and be better.”

Her response brought tears to my eyes. But what she said next made me stutter.

“What are you going to do about it?”

I didn’t have a great answer to give her.

Since then, I’ve been doing a lot of thinking about what I really want out of life, and you should expect a post or two soon outlining just that.

Six years of secondary school has given me the skills that I need to build a successful business and gave me some professional credibility. Unfortunately for me, school didn’t really teach me what I need to do to live my ideal life. Being involved in the blogger community, especially reading Rebecca, and Penelope, and the other bloggers at Brazen Careerist has been the best education that I could have received. Through their inspiration, I’ve started to harness the power of my passion.

I’m moving slowly, and it’s hella frustrating. I never expected to be rich and famous overnight.  I know I’m going to work hard and be patient with myself. I know that soon, my hard work and my passion will get me to where I need to be.

And that’s how I’m crushing it.

Looking for a job is a lonely experience.  Looking for a job in a brand new city across the country is an extremely lonely experience. With all the time I spend applying for jobs, I’ve largely ignored the rest of my life.  The constant worry and rejection, coupled with the “so how’s the job search going?” questions leave me too sad, depressed and anxious to come out and be social.

This week I’m in the Bay Area for an interview. (YAY!)  But in spite of my super excitement about the opportunity and my confidence that I’ll get the job, I’m so sad out here. This is my second trip to the Bay.  On my first trip, I had so much fun.  It was equal parts networking extravaganza and vacation. This trip (because I’m newly poor and jobless) I can’t even afford a hotel or a rental car.  I’m staying with a friend of a friend who happens to live near a BART station (thank GOD).  I’m just starting to be comfortable traveling on the trains. However, I still haven’t ventured on the buses. I constantly worry that I’m overstaying my welcome and will come back to find my suitcase on the sidewalk.

Being out here, I spend a lot of time alone. Sometimes alone is just alone, but sometimes, most times, alone is a very lonely place.  I just wanna go home, drink straight out of my own milk carton and watch my tv in my underwear. (Except, I gave up my apartment, and am now living with my mom–boo).

Being in a new city, alone, is tough. Having to be ON and networking and interviewing in a new city is one of the hardest things I’ve ever done.  Today I was on a train and it hit me. I don’t want to do this by myself and I don’t want to be here by myself anymore.  I’m tired and I’m done.  I cannot do another trip out here like this. If I don’t get a job out of this trip, I think I’ll officially be at rock bottom.

It’s not that I am losing faith. It’s not that I don’t believe in myself. I believe in hard work, I believe in perseverance, I believe in a little bit of luck .  So I’m going BALLS OUT for the next three days. As hard as I’ve been working, all the leads that I’ve followed, all the time and effort I put in, and as big a hit that my credit card has taken (!!!) if nothing happens this week, I need to rethink my strategy.

You know that old saying, “Know when to hold ‘em, know when to fold ‘em, know when to walk away….” I’m not walking away.  I’m going all in.

Wish me luck out here. It’s now or nothing.

I have been having the best week!!! So far, I’ve had

It is day 3 of my Adventures in California, and what an adventure it has been! I’ve have 2 interview already and I have 4 set up for the next 2 days. I’ve also walked around the city, had a tour of Oakland and Berkeley, and today I had a tour of several awesome neighborhoods, visited Fisherman’s Wharf, the Golden Gate Bridge, Sausalito, and a bunch of other stuff.  (my brain is SOOOO full).

I haven’t really processed everything that has happened. I just know it’s been awesome and I’ve loved every second.

Lots of people have asked me, Why San Francisco? Why California? And honestly, I don’t have a great answer.

I’ve always wanted to live in California — in a REAL city. Through my research at school, I’ve come to really appreciate the politics, diversity, and progressiveness of the Bay area.  And frankly, when I daydream about my life, San Francisco makes a great backdrop.

Furthermore, when I think about how I felt about Atlanta and I compare it with how I feel about San Francisco, I’m so glad that the GF and I decided to make this city our new home.  The city (and this state) is not without its problems, and yet, I feel that this area is full of possibilities.  And I know deep in my heart that this is where I’m supposed to be.

I’ve taken over 600 pictures, and hopefully by the weekend I’ll have them up on Flickr.

I just wanted to give a quick update!

I’m going to bed.  The clock says 9pm but my body thinks it is midnight.

This economy is crappy.  It’s March and I don’t have a job yet.

This is not the way I envisioned my life 3 months before graduation.  I sincerely thought I would AT LEAST have some serious leads about jobs.

But nope, it’s like 2003 all over again. I’m graduating and there are no jobs to be had.

I came to graduate school to advance my career.  But instead, I feel like I’m going to be stuck in a job like the one I left, or worse, completely jobless. Both which would suck in so many ways.

And I can’t stop asking myself, “What was the point?” Don’t get me wrong. I have gotten so much from graduate school. The much needed friendships and the sense of purpose that I’ve forged over the past two years are priceless. But when I look at my job prospects, I think I may have slid down the career ladder, instead of skipping up a few notches.

If I can’t get ahead in my career, then MPA School was 2 years of fun on the playground.

I spend hours a day looking at job announcements, applying for jobs, and working on my network. Wanna know what I get for my trouble? A growing stack of rejection letters.

And today I overheard a professor saying that my class shouldn’t expect to have jobs by May.  She said that December was a more realistic goal.

WHAT?!?!

Who has the time, patience, and most importantly, money to be jobless for an extended period of time?  I don’t even think we qualify for unemployment, since we haven’t been fired.

And who has the sanity to deal with the constant barrage of, “We’re sorry, but you’re just not good enough for this organization.”

I get so freaked out thinking about not having a job that I’ve decided to take matters into my own hands.

I’m using my Spring Break to go out to California, and knock on some doors.

Basically the thought of being jobless is SO SCARY that it trumps the fear of traveling to Cali alone (which I’ve never done).  It trumps the fear and tediousness of setting up blind informational interviews (without letting secretaries transfer me to HR).  It trumps the fear of potentially getting thrown out of a whole list of city managers’ offices and pissing someone off. It trumps the fear of being foolish getting laughed out of town. It trumps the fear of cornering the mayor of San Francisco (it is on my itinerary) and convincing him that he NEEDS me on his staff.

The fear of not getting what I want (my dream job) is so strong that it gives me the strength to do other things that would otherwise make me nervous and sweaty.  I’d rather go and fail than not try at all.

I think the odds are in my favor, however.  When I think about the past few jobs I’ve had, this approach has served me well.  My past successes have been during those times where I’ve walked up to someone (literally) and told them why they needed to hire me (and not the dozens of applications that I’d completed).

I had someone who I think is REALLY f-ing smart remind me earlier this week, when I was in the midst of a breakdown, that good things tend to happen to me.  She told me to calm down, regroup and make a plan.  She, and others, keep telling me that it’s still early and I shouldn’t be worried about not finding a job.

Unfortunately, my worry just can’t be turned off. But I did regroup, get myself together, and make a plan.

On Sunday, off I go to California.

To take control of my future, and guerilla my way into a job.

I swam 75 meters on Tuesday.  To all my swimmer friends, I know this isn’t a lot.

In fact it’s only three-fourths of a lap.  And I didn’t swim it all at once. I’d get 25 meters out in the pool and get water up my nose and have to stop. And what I do in the pool, of course, isn’t Michael Phelps quality swimming. This is doggy paddling, at best.

Yet I am EMENSELY proud of myself.  You see, two weeks ago I couldn’t even kick the length of the pool with a kickboard without stopping to make sure I hadn’t drowned. And I couldn’t kick straight to save my life.

By the end of my first lesson I could swim for about 15seconds before I freaked out.

Now I’m big time.

And I’m telling everyone I know.  And usually once people get over their shock and awe that at 27 I’m learning how to swim, everyone asks me what it’s like to be in the water.

And almost without fail my answer is that I’m still learning to move with the water and stop fighting against it.

I’m jealous that I’m splashing around uncontrollably, looking like a crazy person and all the cool swimmers are cutting gracefully and easily through the water.  Apparently, it is possible to go with the flow.

But for a self-proclaimed control freak like me, going with the flow is f-ing hard.

In the water and out.

Water doesn’t do what I say. I can’t control the water; it doesn’t bend to my will.  And neither does life.

While I do have some control over my life (supposedly), I can’t stop life from happening any more than I can stop water from going up my nose.

On Tuesday as I was walking away from the pool, I started thinking about other ways that swimming (or learning to swim) is like life.

Here are 7 things that I have learned about life while I’ve been half-drowning in the pool.

1. Fear keeps you from dying but you can’t let it stop you from diving. I haven’t actually dived into the pool, but every time my swim teacher tells me to glide through the water without the safety of a noodle a part of me freaks out. I start breathing funny and my heart speeds up. I have to calm myself down before I can even start swimming.  I may not ever be 100% comfortable in the water, but I’m not going to let that stop me from doing what I want to do.

In life, I may find myself in uncomfortable, awkward or scary situations but I can’t let my fear stop me from doing what I need to do to be successful or happy.

2. Don’t be afraid to use the wall. In the pool, my swim teacher tells me to kick off the wall to give myself some momentum before I start kicking. Pushing off the wall gives you some power to move through the water faster. I don’t necessarily HAVE to push off the wall start swimming, but when I do, I move farther faster.

This reminds me of the importance of networking.  As I look for a post-graduation job, I tell everyone where I’m looking and what I’m looking for. Everyone I know knows someone else who could hook me up with the right person to get me a job. I could find a job without my network, but if I use my network, I’ll have a leg up on finding the right position for me.

3. Don’t mind the other swimmers. There are only 6 or 8 lanes at the pool at school. In order to accommodate all the swimmers, we have to circle swim.  To circle swim, you swim on the right side of the lane and swim counter-clockwise around the lane. The times that I have had to circle swim, I’ve had to share a lane with 2-3 other people. And as a newbie, I’m slow. Really slow. With circle swimming, if a swimmer is slow, it’s ok to pass on the left (like on the interstate).  I get passed often.  And I have to remember that I’m new at swimming and I’m not perfect. And more importantly, I may NEVER be a perfect swimmer. And I’m ok with that (usually).

I have to do the best I can in all my endeavors, and on some days my best may not be that great. At any rate, I HAVE to cut myself some slack. I’m not perfect, none of us are. Those brilliant swimmers in the pool may not be great at something that I kick ass in. So it’s ok that they swim circles around me, I just have to keep kicking, and doing MY best.

4. Keep Kicking. In the pool, I push off the wall with one foot and propel myself through the water. Soon, if I don’t do anything, I’ll start to go underwater, and that is bad.  So it only took me sinking a couple of times to figure out that if I wanted NOT to sink, I needed to kick. And as long as I keep kicking I’ll keep moving and I won’t drown. And not drowning is the goal.

The same is true in life. Standing still makes you stagnant and doesn’t get you anywhere. As Dorie told us in Finding Nemo, “Just keep swimming” If you keep moving you’ll get to where you need to go.

5. Shit happens. I get water up my nose. I get cramps in my legs. I fall off my noodle. I haven’t mastered the breast stroke kick and move backward instead of forward (it’s very complicated). I sink (often). And whenever these horrible things happen to me, I clear my ears and nose, catch my balance, breathe and try it again.

Bad stuff happens sometimes. No need to ponder it, no need to overanalyze it. The best thing to do is figure out how to make sure it doesn’t happen a second time, try it again and do it better the next time.

6. Swimming is hard. Swimming is hard because I don’t know what the hell I’m doing, but it is also hard because it takes your entire body to do it. Your legs are kicking, your arms are paddling, your core is holding you up, and you’re trying to breathe and not die.  Swimming is serious work!

Life can be hard too. We pour ourselves into our work, our relationships, and our families and sometimes it seems that we are barely making it. Sometimes we fall behind or are unable to keep our heads up.  But at the end of the day, when we think about what we’ve accomplished, (hopefully) it’s all worth it. Just like when I look back at the wall from 25 meters out and see how far I went all by myself, I can’t help but clap for myself and scream yay!

7. Swim teachers are the best. I’m scared to go doggy paddling alone. Most of the stuff that I do with my teacher; I would be crazy to do by myself. I allow myself to take more risks (and do things like launch myself through the water) because I trust the person who’s out there with me. She’s always close. And during those times when she makes me do something really scary, like float on my back, she reminds me that she’s right there. So I relax a little and I float! And she’s really great at telling me what an awesome job I’m doing.

Friends and loved ones rock. You can lean on them when you’re not strong. They’ll help you carry on. I live my life easier knowing that if I’m having a problem, am hungry, need someone to make me laugh or to help me carry a humongous TV into my  house, or if I just need someone to remind me of how awesome I am, I have a whole host of people to call and lean on.

I think I’ve mentioned at least once or twice how I love my job at the Chamber of Commerce. I’ve learned a lot since I started working there. I’ve learned so much; about myself, the kind of job I want in the future, and about the kinds of work I want to do. (An ode to why I love the Chamber is in the works, just not for today.)

Last week, I approached my boss to ask for the week between X-mas and News Year’s off.  And was informed that my services would not be needed after Wednesday. This coming Wednesday.  Sadness (and panic), ensues.

I mean my boss was is awesome.  He made sure I understood why I’m being laid off. I’mbeing laid off because they can’t afford me, not because I suck as an employee.  He even said that I rock as an employee and he wishes he could keep me and he’s being talking me up to folks who may be in a position to hire me.

I can’t believe that I’m being LAID OFF, this is so weird.

Why I’m being laid off (a longer version):

You see, the Chamber of Commerce is a membership organization.  Their members are local area businesses. And in a recession, businesses make less money.  All the businesses, regardless of whether they are professional services, restaurants, retailers, bars, or financial institutions when they make less money, they cut stuff to preserve the bottom line.   And some (I don’t know how many, exactly) of the Chamber’s members are not renewing their dues. I know the real estate and development community has been hit pretty hard.

As the Chamber’s members tighten their belts, the Chamber has to tighten theirs. And the intern budget disappears.

So I’m jobless. And not because I did anything wrong. Which makes it so much easier and happier (you can tell by my use of flowers and smiley faces and exclamation points, how much I mean this)

How the hell did I not see this coming???

But I didn’t see it coming. All this time, I’ve been making fun of the Big 3 and how they failed to innovate or do ANYTHING really.

And I’ve been scratching my head about the financial crisis and have shaken my head in disgust in my policy class when we would learn about the greed of Wall Street investors and am incredulous that they could do the sh*t they’ve done and still be holding their hands out.

I still haven’t figured out what the fu*k is the problem with the banks and why the hell can’t they just LEND money.

I’ve rolled my eyes at folks who made bad mortgages decisions. I mean, when I was looking for a home at age 24 I knew enough not to get into a ARM or a Balloon or a variable rate mortgage, so how are all these other people stupid enough to fall for it?

Well, I’ve heard the Chamber’s Executive Director talk about how next year will be the hardest year for the Chamber, who over the past 10 years has experienced double digit growth, but for the first time ever will be facing a cut.

But I didn’t know that meant that I’d be history.

Basically, I was stupid.  I thought that if I did more than my job, took initiative (asked for more work), and stayed visible and engaged, I’d have a job as long as I wanted it.

I was wrong. Sometimes when you do everything right sh*t still happens. And since I’m the low man on the totem pole, I shouldn’t be surprised that I happened to me.

It is fu*king hard out there for a pimp. (and I should know, as I am a pimp)

And the more I’ve thought about it today, even as I made a list of all the organizations in the area that I’ve like to work for the next semester, places I’m going to call right after the holiday break, I realized that probably every one of those organizations is going through a hard time. And as organizations slash millions from their budgets I KNOW that hiring me is going to be a hard sell.

Then I read this offer on Havi’s blog today and it seemed like a dream.  So I applied. And while I didn’t get the offer, it has given me another angle with which to approach my next move. And it gave me hope that work does exist. And I mean work from anywhere in the world kind of work, which would be awesome.

I mean, I’ve been toying with the whole freelance copywriting idea since the summer, and even talked to Naomi about it. But I never followed up or through.

So I’m developing my pitch, which will highlight the fact that hiring me as a contract working is WAY cheaper than hiring a full time employee, the fact that I can research and write, and the fact that I know all the local players.  And one of my favorite local news sources has even mentioned the fact that I’m hirable.  And that gives me hope.

And Kelly gave me a whole list of sites that I can use, in addition to what Naomi gave me, to start seriously start copywriting. And I starting feeling a little better. A little more hopeful.

And I talked to the gf and shared my fears about never getting a job (now or before May) because this is like a replay of 2003 right after Bush bombed Iraq and all the job leads I had dried up (I wanted to be an au pair in France, but after the bombs fell and the whole freedom fries thing, French parents started specifying English, from England au pairs, not American English-speaking girls.)  That’s right the Spring of 2003 was the pre-cursor to Hell Year!!

And when I think about that I get nervous and I start to sweat and I get paralyzed and unable to do ANYTHING. Then the gf tells me that she believes in me, enough even, that I don’t have to believe in myself today. And that gives me LOTS of hope, because she’s pretty smart, and she wouldn’t have faith in me if I were a complete loser.

To all my fellow low men on the totem pole, I wish I had something uplifting and spiritual and sh*t to share with you to make you feel that your job is not  in danger.

Sorry, I can’t say that.

But I can say that even if the complete bottom falls out. I am NOT too proud to work at Target. I am NOT too proud to bus tables. I am NOT too proud to work at the mall. (and neither should you be)

But I don’t really want to work at any of those places (and neither do you). What I do want to do is convince organizations that they need my skills (even if they don’t necessary have the budget for staff) and that hiring me to work on projects saves them time and money, and helps them to check small-ish projects off their to-do list.

So I’m still tackling the list of organizations that I made earlier today, I’m just refining the way I talk to them. And I’m no longer panicked. I have a plan. A plan that I probably should have BEEN working on, anyway.

How are you recession-proofing your job?

For a couple of months, I’ve been toying with the idea of developing an on-line networking site.  I’ve spent countless hours (when I probably should have been working on my studies) thinking about the different aspects and features of my very cool networking site.  I multi-tasked in class looking at different software that I could use to develop it. I thought about domain names, and mission statements, and how to build a business brand (or at least a non-profit) around my idea.  Like everything I do, I obsessed about it.

So.

Here’s my idea. Or the story behind my idea.

2 weeks ago I listened (or pretended to) to a lecture by a government hack who was talking a group of other government hacks (and future government hacks, i.e. MPAers) about the way we Gen Y and Millennial (and Gen X to a certain extent) MPA, MPP degree holders manage our careers.

His main points:

We change jobs frequently. We aren’t attached to a job title, an organization or a boss.  If something better, more fun, more interesting, more engaging comes along; we bounce like a bad check.  On to bigger and better things. (This is not a surprise to anyone under 32.)

We change sectors frequently. We don’t particularly care if we work for non-profits, governments (local, state or federal), or the private sector or ourselves. And at some point in our careers, most of us will have worked for a combination of these entities.  Most of us are in it to make a difference, change the world, start a revolution-otherwise we would be getting MBA’s and not MPA’s. And chasing the almighty dollar.

Ahem.  That is the back story.

This is the front.

I am looking for a work opportunity and I want to expand my professional work-related network. I would say I want to start my career but that sounds so stick in the mud and is so.not.me. I would say I’m looking for a job, but “job” sounds hard and boring and I don’t want work to be hard, I want it to be fun, engaging and I want to contribute to the welfare of my fellow man, dammit.  And I really don’t care who I work for.

And I figured there are lots of others just like me, graduating with a MPA, MPP, Political Science, Social Policy, blah blah blah degree but not really looking to be a cog in someone else’s wheel. And I know there are other young professionals and recent grads just like us who are trying to get off the bureaucracy bandwagon and actually DO something useful.  Even if it’s just for volunteer.

And then I thought, Wouldn’t it be fun if we all (all the world changers, in all job sectors, around the world) had a place where we could meet, greet, exchange ideas, talk about available jobs, share our work/war stories (horror and other) network, chit chat, build a community, make a difference, help each other and save the world (and the whales)?

My networking site could be a hub for all the sh!t that I think about when I’m sitting in class learning (supposedly) how to affect organizational change or read a regression line.

Today my school sent me a survey, no doubt sponsored by the government hack from the beginning of the story, and it listed some of the best known on-line social media outlets (myspace, facebook, linkedin, blogs)  and asked the question, which of these do you utilize  most? I scrolled down to the bottom of the list, because, of course, I use them all and I want pick the other box so I can add twitter (and ping) and when I get to the bottom I see a website that I have never heard of.

Like all things internet related, I must know what this mysterious, unknown website is……

And damn if it’s not my f*cking idea!  Just in case you, like me, have been living under a rock, apparently, and have never heard of this site; it is Idealist.org and it is pretty f*cking cool.  I’m just mad I didn’t think of it first. Dammit.

Now I have to think of another big idea. Sh!t.

So I’ve been thinking (for ages) about writing this post, but something else always trumped it. So today is the day! Because,…well, I just want to give the relationship series a break for a little while.

I believe in people. I believe that it is people (not policies or businesses or markets, or any other inorganic, non-breathing thing) that make the world go ‘round. I believe this so much that, right now, as I look for my dream job I’m not hella keen to fill out a bunch of job applications. I just don’t think my life works that way.

Let me back up and explain.

Last year, I really wanted (not wanted, needed desperately) to spend the summer in Atlanta. Unfortunately, I’ve lived and build my network in North Carolina, so the idea of trying to find an internship in another state gave me heart palpitations. I didn’t know what I was going to do.

I mean, I could have d*amn near picked from a stack of NC internships (yes, the girl is THAT good) but no one KNOWS me in Atlanta, and worse, I DIDN”T KNOW ANYBODY. And I knew that I would be competing with students from Ga schools who would also be in the market for summer professional work experience. (which also increased my anxiety level)

For weeks, I spend tons of fruitless hours looking for internships; cold calling, cold emailing, I did online internship searches, I was on listserves… you name it, I did it. All the while, I felt a clock ticking telling me time was running out. (Granted it was freaking October, but I had a mission, remember?)

Wanna know how I got my internship?

One person who knew me =>  knew two people who worked in Atlanta => who got me two interviews => which got me my internship.

I was at a student/faculty meet and greet where I introduced myself as, “Monica, a first year grad student who wants to intern in Atlanta for the summer.” One of the professors said, I used to work in Atlanta, send me your resume and I’ll see what I can do.

Summer internship? Check!

Before I left for Atlanta, I was already thinking ahead to where I wanted to work when I came back to NC for school.  I happened to be at an event with the Executive Director of the Chamber of Commerce (where I knew I wanted to work). I approached him, reminded him of who I am (he remembered) and I asked him for a job.

I told him that I was going to be away for the summer, but that I would love to do a phone interview to talk about the arrangement. A business card, a month, and one phone interview later, I already knew where I was going to be working when I left Atlanta (and I hadn’t even gotten to Atlanta, yet!)

Year-long internship? Check!

This summer, the day that I was moving to Atlanta, I was in a car accident. Allegedly, the accident was my fault and I got a traffic ticket. The terms of the ticket were that A.) I could just pay it (NOT.GONNA.HAPPEN!) B.) I could get a lawyer to appear in court (NOT! That costs $$$, which I didn’t have) or C. I could appear in court.

By the way, I always appear in court and defend myself.  I think of it as practice for when I’m an attorney.

The problem with me appearing in court in North Carolina was that I was going to be living 6 hours away, and my court date was a Wednesday. So, I would have to miss some work time (and $$$) to drive, appear in court, and drive right back. (And gas prices were NO JOKE).  I knew there was no way that I was going to make that court date.

So I did what anyone would have done. I called the court to see if I could get the court date moved.  No luck. The lady told me some story claiming that I had to appear in person to change my court date. I tried to explain that I was a student who was out of the state, and I couldn’t appear in person to change the date anymore than I could actually appear on the date they gave me.  She didn’t get it.

There was an hour or two when I was frustrated and almost willing to just say “f*ck it! I just won’t show up, since they are making it so difficult to play by the rules”. BTW, that would have triggered a warrant for my arrest, which would have been unfortunate.

Then I remembered my ace.

I once interned in the Clerk of Court office, and later I’d interviewed for a job there. So I emailed the guy that I’d interviewed with (like three and a half years prior), reminded him of who I was (he remembered), told him my situation, and asked what he could do.

Less than an hour later, I had a new court date.

This is the story of my life.

I could go on and on. At least 4 other jobs/internship that I’ve had over the years I’ve gotten because I knew someone who knew someone who got me in front of someone who could get me a job.

I can also tell you of at least one job that I was the runner-up on (also got that interview because I knew someone who knew someone). Guess who got the job? Someone they already knew.

This is the power of people. This is why I network my @ss off. This is why I collect business cards, shake hands and kiss babies.

The people you meet and the people you know totally make a difference.

This is why, during this new job search, I roll my eyes every time I fill out an application. I don’t think I’m going to get my dream job from filling out applications. I totally believe that I’m going to get my dream job by telling my network, “Hey, everyone! I’m looking for my dream job in the San Francisco Bay area.  You know anybody out there? Can you help a sista out?

Then I’m just going so sit back and wait for the goodness to happen. It NEVER fails.

And I’m not playing. Do YOU know anybody in the Bay area? Hit me up. I’m looking for a job.

1. Why does it hurts my heart a little bit to see something in print that I already knew intellectually but am still having problems with in reality?

2. I heart my new job already even though (or maybe because) I’m in waaaaay over my head and this is only day one!!!!!

3. I love conferences and hanging out with folks that I can learn from (and I get to do it twice in September)

4. I’m so glad it’s Friday, even though I really haven’t done sh*t all week.

5. I have a great network of colleagues (and a hell of a lot of institutional knowledge) in NC that I will be sad to leave next May

6. I think I am (finally) getting used to being back in NC, even though I still can’t bring myself to try to cook for one

7. I have a feeling that there will be heavy drinking this weekend

8. Apparently there are lots of promiscuous women in America, and I happen to NOT be one of them (did I miss out on anything?) For those of you raising your hand and objecting at this information, shut up, the f*cking numbers speak for themselves!!!

9. How lucky blessed am I to be living my life?  This is the f*cking dream!

10.  My boss is 26.  And his boss hugged me this morning.

As my summer internship is coming to a close, the gf and I have been talking a bit about what we are going to do after I graduate from my super awesome MPA program.

We’ve talked about staying in Atlanta. I vetoed that because I hate the traffic, hate the sprawl, hate the rampant poverty, hate the politics (I could go on). We talked about staying in North Carolina, where she could finish some course work and I could work in a place where I have already established a network. She vetoed that because she’s already lived in NC for 10 and wants to try something else, and she also made a good argument about me moving beyond my comfort zone. So, bottom line, we are moving somewhere completely new.

I have been building a list of “places to live” for a while, and amazingly so has the gf. And even more amazingly, we have a number of cities in common. So the places that we are currently looking at for next year are Denver, Colorado and Tempe, Arizona.

The gf, who is a bit more “control” than I am, asked me last week if I had started looking for jobs, to which I replied that no, I hadn’t started looking at jobs (I’m not moving until next year!!! I have some time yet.) I was able to report that I had started researching the different organizations in the city to see if any interest me. Actually, I started looking at a number of cities as early as last August to see the different kinds of downtown planning they were engaging in.

That’s when the gf said something that I’d never thought of. She said that by looking at the job market now, I could start preparing for what will be on the market next year.

In her care, it totally makes sense. Her field is Educational Technology, which is still so new of a field that she sometimes has to explain to potential employers that they need someone with her skills. So if there are organizations in Denver and Tempe that already understand that they need someone with her particular skill set, then she already has a leg up.

In my case, I’m not so sure that canvassing the job market now will give me any indication of what will be available because local governments don’t really recruit on CareerBuilder. They usually recruit on their own sites and on government specific job sites. I can put myself in a better position by making friends with government headhunters or with local government managers in the area or that already work in organizations that interest me. It makes more sense for me to tell them that I’m interested in moving and working in Denver/Tempe/wherever and beg them to keep me (and my resume) in mind. (I’m already starting to work on strengthening my network in the mid and southwest)

We did have a giggle at my ability to get jobs just by expressing interest and asking for an informational interview. So often when talking to potential employers, I start by saying, I’m Monica. I’m an MPA student at UNC and I’m interesting in learning more about what you do. Can I come by and talk to you? During the interview, if I like what I hear, I give them my pitch. I tell them how I can help them with whatever problem/issue/new development they are having. I’ve gotten at least two of my last jobs that way

And even if having informational interviews doesn’t get me a job, it still gives me one more person to add to my network.